You may have seen Michele Borba, ED.D. on the Today Show giving advice on teaching character strengths to children.
I was lucky enough to see her speak at a school in Philadelphia. You can tell she is the EXPERT and one of the most passionate advocates for children and teens.
If you have not seen her, spend some time on You Tube to see and witness what I mean.
Thrivers: The Surprising Reason Why Some Kids Struggle and Others Shine
Dr. Borba says Thrivers are made not born.
Even before the pandemic, children were stressed, lonely and overwhelmed. According to Dr. Borba, we have focused so much on testing and being competitive, we have lost touch and not taught children how to be human.
When I read this….it caused a moment of pause. It is a profound statement and one I believe to be true.
My heart goes out to children. I often wonder what is happening to their ability to connect.
What is it like for them to build relationships with their friends at the moment? How about with other adults outside of their parents?
Many children have dealt with this for years as we have become so accustomed to our lives orbiting around our digital devices.
What is in store for this generation that has been robbed of social interactions now for almost a year and tied to devices to make somewhat of a human connection?
Over the years as I have worked with parents, I often hear the comment “they will listen to you more than me”- meaning, when teaching manners, children listen to a third party. For some reason this is the way of the world.
Finding moments or dedicated time to teach manners in your classroom is actually very easy. Most likely you are using good social skills all day every day in the classroom (virtual or in-person).
Manners and Life Skills such as:
Eye contact: When using eye contact, point out what you are doing. As students use good eye contact, let them know you noticed.
Respect: Point out respectful behaviors as you see certain actions (helping others, expressing gratitude, holding the door, saying “good morning”)
Conversation skills: We have multiple conversations a day. Recognize students when they engage with each other. Conversation skills are becoming a lost art. This skill is the cornerstone of building friendships.
There has been a focus at the school level in many states to focus on the whole child.
Teachers love using our lesson plans to teach manners in their classroom. The lesson plan objective along with suggested dialogues and handouts are included.
Instills Confidence: MostChildren are social beings and enjoy eating together.When they know the basics…napkin in lap and using it, chew with their mouth closed, etc. they feel good about themselves.They are confident.They know what to do when eating with others.
Joy in Helping: Setting the table starts the ritual of eating together.When you allow children to take an active role, they feel useful. Taking out the plates, forks and napkins sets the tone for togetherness.This can be in the cafeteria at school, in the classroom or at home.
There is so much joy in helping out a parent or teacher. They can also take on a role at the end of the meal by clearing the table (how fun is that chore!).
Conversation Skills: I always tell teachers and parents, if you want your children to have good conversation skills, sit down together at meal time.Not only does sitting down together to eat teach table manners, this act also teaches everyone about talking to each other.
Ask questions.Learn what happened during the day.This is a simple step to take and adds so much value for life.
A new book, Modern Manners for Moms and Dads: Practical Parenting Solutions for Sticky Social Situations is being released this week. This is a must read for parents and teachers.
I am thrilled I had the chance to interview them yesterday. They are smart and savvy moms that share real-life experiences in their new book.
This is not your grandmother’s parenting book. Their book deals with issues on guiding young children in today’s hectic and ever-changing world.
From birthday parties to how to ask children if it is ok to post their pictures on your social media, all the questions you ponder as a parent or teacher are answered.
And some of their answers may surprise you.
Take time to make a latte or a cup of tea and enjoy as I interview them about all things sticky when out and about in your daily life with young children.
Yes, we get a bit nerdy about social skills but I promise you will learn so much that you can share with children, spouses and other teachers.
Elizabeth and I connected by phone one evening as she had questions about our curriculum.The school purchased the Manners To Go lesson plans to teach first impressions, communications skills and table manners to her students.
The Hawbridge School in North Carolina where she has taught for many years has a dedicated life skills program.
Listen in, as we have an informative discussion about the benefits and the reasons why life skills are important.
Oh!And listen for her discussion about a “slow lunch” and why this is so meaningful for her students.In fact, they love it so much they ask for it frequently.